QuiverX Newsletter - Hush Little Baby

Parenting

Today I'm starting a series that looks at the various stages of childhood and some of the parenting issues that go with each stage. First, let's look at babies, specifically at crying.
All babies cry - we know that. And parents hate to listen to their baby crying. I think God put that response in us so we would be sure to meet our baby's needs. After all, the only way a baby can tell us when they need something is by crying. I tell my older children that crying is the only way a baby can talk.

But should we run to pick up the baby as soon as he starts crying? There was a school of thought, years ago, that doing so would spoil the baby. Lately, with the advent of Attachment Parenting, mothers have been much closer to the baby, sometimes even "wearing" them, so there is no need to go pick him up. And yet, even children who are parented in this manner still cry sometimes.

I used to be very quick to pick up my baby when he cried. I never could listen to my baby cry without feeling terribly guilty. In retrospect, this developed some bad habits in my older children when they were very young. Sometimes giving a child everything he wants isn't the best thing to do.

I learned this lesson when God gave me my third child. She was adorable, and sweet, and very intense. When she was 6 weeks old she began to notice the world around her, and she couldn't keep her eyes off it! But, she was too young to be able to handle all of this stimulation. When bedtime came, she was very tired, but she was too stimulated to fall asleep, so she cried.
We tried everything we could think of, and everything anyone suggested to us. We walked with her, rocked her, nursed her, drove her in the car, put her car seat on the dryer while it ran, kept her in a dark room, made sure it was a quiet room, tried to keep the day quiet and boring - everything we could think of, praying all the while. In spite of all our efforts, she still cried for 45 minutes each night before finally falling asleep. We realized that she really NEEDED to cry at night, at least for the time being. We finally understood that it was the only way she could unwind from the day. We decided that we had two choices - let her cry by herself in her crib or hold her while she cried. I decided that she was too little to leave by herself, so I held her while she cried. Thankfully, she outgrew this stage when she was about 3.5 months old.

This was the beginning of my journey to understanding balance on the subject of babies crying. I no longer run to pick up the baby when he cries. I realized that it doesn't hurt my baby if he cries for a little bit. As a result, my toddlers sleep very well. They don't wake up in the night and expect me to come running (or come to find me). I think it's because they sometimes cried and I didn't come running immediately. They usually don't cry in the car, maybe because they have learned that they will have to wait till we stop to get picked up. Jim says that sooner or later the child will have to learn that the world doesn't revolve around them, so it might as well be sooner.
In a large family, every child has to learn to wait their turn. The baby sometimes has to wait to nurse because Mommy is changing a brother's diaper or getting juice for a sister. Baby might cry a bit, but he learns quickly that Mommy will come as soon as she can, but it might be a minute or two. And he learns that it's ok to wait.

Now, I will say that I don't let my little babies cry for long periods of time. I nurse on demand, so I don't make them cry until the next feeding. And I don't let them cry themselves to sleep until they are older, but we'll talk about that next time. What I'm talking about here, really, is that when you are busy with your family and baby cries, don't feel guilty if he has to wait for a bit. Get to him as soon as you can, but don't drop everything as soon as he fusses. He'll be just fine.


Health

I went to the chiropractor last night and I am again amazed at how much better I feel. My baby is 3 months old now, and all those hormones that loosen up your joints are fading. I realized that as my joints were setting up again, they weren't aligned quite right. I'm so thankful for a wonderful chiropractor who can set things right for me.

It occurred to me that many other moms who have had several pregnancies would probably benefit from the attention of a chiropractor. The stress on our joints, especially our back and hips, from carrying our children can cause our bones to get out of alignment. Those hormones that relax our joints don't help any either. It may not manifest in overt pain, but it can certainly limit our function and hinder our health.

At my visit last night, my doctor fixed my neck and my back between the shoulder blades. In the 12 hours or so since my visit, the fluid that had been collected in my ear has drained and my neck feels much looser. My doctor also fixed my sacrum - that's the bone that fits between your hip bones. Mine was not aligned properly and it hurt! I could move pretty well, but I had trouble bending over, and I certainly couldn't pick anything up. Today my back feels so much better. I can bend and pick things up without pain. Even my varicose veins are better, probably from the improved blood flow in my hips.

If you have the ability to visit a chiropractor, especially if you are a mom of many children, I would suggest you do so. I don't go as often as I should, but my insurance only pays for 10 visits a year. But even occasional visits help a lot. It can make a huge difference in how you feel!


Recipe

I made this for dinner the other night and it was a hit. I've made the Chicken and gravy before, but it was a first for the biscuits. They were light and fluffy! Yummy! And all without any artificial additives and preservatives!

Chicken and Gravy

1.5 lbs chicken, cooked and cut into bite size pieces
1 Tbs olive oil
2 Tbs butter
1 russet potato, washed and diced
2 carrots, washed and diced
1 onion, sliced or chopped
1 rib celery, sliced
1 bay leaf
1 tsp poultry seasoning
3 Tbs flour (if you are leaving out the potato, make this 4 Tbs)
1 qt chicken stock
1 cup frozen peas

Place large pot over medium heat. Add oil, butter, veggies, and bay leaf. Cook for 5 minutes, stirring frequently. Season with salt and pepper, add poultry seasoning. Add flour, stirring well. Cook for 2 minutes. Stir in stock and bring to a boil. Add chicken and stir. Cook until thickened (gravy will thicken some as it cools). Stir in peas just before serving. Serve with biscuits.

Biscuit Sticks

1 3/4 cup flour
1/2 tsp salt
3 tsp baking powder
4-6 Tbs butter, cold and cubed
3/4 cup milk

Preheat oven to 450.

In large bowl, sift dry ingredients. Add butter; cut it into dry ingredients with pastry blender. When the butter is too small to see, make a well in the center of the flour mixture; pour milk into well. Stir till dough is free from the sides of the bowl; turn onto floured board. Knead gently and quickly, 8-10 times. Roll with floured rolling pin till dough is 1/2" thick. Cut sticks into 1'2" strips, about 3" long. Brush with melted butter if desired. Bake 5-8 min.

(You could probably make these into round biscuits with a round cutter. Just bake them longer.)


Quick Tip

KISS - Keep It Super Simple

Since we're talking about babies in this edition, I'll tell you some of the tricks I've learned to make life with babies easier.

Diaper bag - I keep my main bag in the house, and keep it stocked. I often have an older child check the supplies before we leave. I carry 3 of each size diaper or pullup, just in case. I also keep an emergency bag in each vehicle. It has 2 of each size diaper, a small package of wipes, a change of clothes for the baby, and a blanket or two (usually a warm one and a lighter one). That way, if I forget my diaper bag (as I'm prone to do) or if I run out of supplies, I have more in the car.

Crib - I don't actually use a crib for my babies. I put a porta-crib next to my bed, and that is just the right size. The bassinet inserts are the right height for me to reach a small baby in the night to nurse. For a very young baby who hasn't begun to roll over, I use an old car seat carrier (with straps removed) for the baby to sleep in. They aren't totally on their back, so they sleep a bit better.

Nursing in public - I have a nursing cover that I made that I use when I nurse in public. It's made from light cotton fabric, so it's not hot in the summer. It's a dark print, so it's not see-through. It's about 1 yard of fabric with the edges finished and an off-center hole cut out for my head. I put the cover over my head and it covers baby while he nurses. Having the cover go over my head keeps older babies from pulling it off. I've seen them for sale (at Target I think, but that was a long time ago) but I made my own because I wanted to choose the fabric.


Matthew 19:14 NKJV "But Jesus said, 'Let the little children come to Me, and do not forbid them; for of such is the kingdom of heaven.'"